This post sums up what we have been up to for the last few weeks after submission, in preparation for the New Designers exhibition in London this upcoming July. We knew that at the time of submission, the incompleteness of Kinnaree was not ideal for New Designers. There were major issues regarding the editing of Act two and three; the shots didn't work as a composition; there was hardly any communication between the two characters and the position of the characters in the scene was confusing. It should have been a thing of the past going about the editing of our animation the right way, re-evaluating things like the order of shots and the camera behaviour.
This is our first attempt in re-story-boarding. In this version, we attempted to scrap the part where Kinnaree was falling and instead replaced it with facial communication between the two.
This second version based on playblasts is our most resolved one. We are happy the shots work a lot better now and hoping to keep on animating the rest of the scenes this weekend.
Also, some environment experimentation we've been up to to enhance the props.
Hi guys,
ReplyDeleteOkay - some quick feedback for you:
The scene when Kinnaree is 'tugged' towards the right of the screen (because off camera, Hemmy has grabbed her tail); I think you should cut directly from this shot - to the shot of Hemmy holding the feather in his mouth; so, Kinnaree is pulled off balance and then we see why straight away. Right now, I don't quite understand the purpose of the shot after Kinnaree is tugged when we see Hemmy and Kinnaree together. Try it anyway for the flow.
The falling scene; the composition of the mid-shot (as she falls) just seems a bit weird to me - it's a strange shot: the camera is high - and you've got a lot of empty space around her. Perhaps this is a strategic camera position, but I think you should explore the framing of Kinnaree here and find something that feels a bit more authoritative and purposeful than now. Also, I think you can cut to the close-up of Kinnaree falling more quickly, as right now we see her hit the ground in the first shot and then we cut to the close-up, she appears to be hitting the ground again, so cut from the first shot sooner and the flow will improve.
The shot when Hemmy's eyeline synchs with the shot of Kinnaree rising up infront of him works very nicely; but there's something a bit odd about the cut to the next shot of Kinnaree - now from the side. If you were to intercut here another short shot of Hemmy looking all 'puss in boots' and then pick up again with the side view of Kinnaree, I think the flow will improve.
Kinnaree's point of view of the stick - again, reconsider your framing; right now, only the tip of one of her toes is visible; I suggest you frame this shot so her feet are much more clearly visible and that this POV shot is much more obviously Kinnarree's - looking down at the floor.
Just remember too some of those conversations about using foreground elements to further 'frame' and direct our focus; I'm not the only one to observe that in the original submission, the close-up shot of Kinnaree framed by the forest is very effective (a number of students in different year groups have picked up on this one shot as being 'perfect' - without any prompting from me) - and it's largely due to this shot feeling 'complete' in terms of the blend of design and animation and composition etc. If you've got that 'empty stage' feeling in some of your wide shots, identify ways to bring your world back in.
More generally, this sequence is about a million times more readable now, so well bloody done - and keep it this focused and efficient - it's really paying off :)